Life of Moni

My Scariest Moment

2011-10-30T19:46:00.000-07:00

A few years back, I experienced a very scary thing that happened to me in the middle of the night. I was lying there asleep, when I was awoken by the feel of something moving on me. It wasn't small like a bug. It was bigger, like a rodent or small animal. I sat part-way up as I came awake, and the thing moved again on my lap.
It was dark in the room so I couldn't see what it was. I sat up straighter, and it moved again, only this time it flew up into my face. I jumped out of bed, and the thing continued to fly around my face - hitting me in the face, and flying around my head in my hair.
My only thought was that it was a bat or something like it. I was jumping around, freaking out, trying to swat at it, but it kept flying around my face and hair.
I reached out for it to try and grab it and stop it, whatever it was. Finally I succeeded. I had the thing in my hand. Holding onto it, I turned on the light. To my utter astonishment, what I was holding onto was... my own hand!

It was numb, all the way up my arm. Somehow my hand and arm had fallen completely asleep during the night, and my body was trying to get the blood flowing again by flailing it around - and completely scaring me in the process!

True story!!

Happy Halloween!

Monica's Birth Chart Analyzation - Part 4 (North Node, Saturn, & Uranus)

2010-10-01T11:46:00.001-07:00

Next we will look at the planet Saturn. It is occupying the sign of Virgo, which is also the sign of your North Node. Remember that the North Node is opposite your South Node and shows what way of being was most foreign to you at birth which requires stretching out of your comfort zone in order for you to develop it. Saturn represents the development of discipline and commitment. It shows what you need to do in order to mature, and also points to obstacles that may show up in life which require discipline in order to overcome. With Saturn in the same sign as your North Node, you may have a bit of a handicap in the sign of Virgo.
Let’s look at Virgo as compared to your South Node Pisces. Pisces is a day-dreamer and a drifter, where Virgo is duty-bound, responsible, and can’t stand idleness. Pisces enjoys the experience of spirituality, where Virgo believes in constant self-improvement through the performance of the law. Pisces is loving and empathetic, where Virgo goes out and serves people in order to perfect the self. Pisces enjoys fantasy, and Virgo lives in the real world. Pisces expresses the soul through imaginative and creative outlets, where Virgo seeks to learn meaningful skills and to be of use to society. Now the development of the North Node doesn’t mean you need to leave behind the qualities of your South Node (especially since you still have Venus in Pisces, showing you have more to learn and develop in this sign), but it shows that there are new qualities that you can add to your Piscean nature which will make you more balanced and grounded.
Virgo has an underlying motivation to obtain perfection. This may not be a natural drive for you, but may show up when you are feeling especially disciplined. Saturn in Virgo shows that you need to develop discipline in order to obtain perfection. Although with Saturn in Virgo, you may feel like there is some sort of obstacle in the way of your ability to be perfect – at anything. If you commit yourself and really discipline yourself, you will be able to develop more of your Virgo qualities which will allow for greater precision, organization and perfection, but you will have to care enough to seek it first. Virgo is very self-sacrificing, and this is something that may also not be very natural for you. It requires both stretching out of your comfort zone and discipline in order for you to do, but developing this aspect of yourself will lead to greater personal satisfaction. Virgo is an earth sign and is related to the health of the body. With Saturn here you may have some health obstacles in your life and may have to discipline yourself to take greater care of your body in order to overcome these obstacles.
Saturn in Virgo is in the 3rd house – the House of Learning & Communication. This is also the house of your North Node. This house relates to any experiences where you get to learn and gather information – including school, seminars, media, books, etc. It also relates to experiences of communicating and sharing information – including teaching, speaking, writing, etc. With your North Node here, one or more of these areas of life may have felt out of your comfort zone at one point, or may still. Through discipline and experience, you may have developed a greater comfort level in this area of life. School is a big chapter of life, so attendance at public school is one area of 3rd house experience that has given you the chance to develop your Saturn in Virgo qualities. School brings up the opportunity for you to discipline yourself in order to be precise and perfect, especially in your homework assignments. Remember Virgo is duty-bound, so school is one area of life that you may feel a greater need to be responsible and do your duty, though this is never easy. It always requires discipline and commitment on your part. Luckily your Mercury in Aries enjoys the mental challenges presented to you. Saturn in the House of Communication may show obstacles in your ability to communicate and express yourself. You may have to really discipline yourself to be heard and understood. You may also have to really discipline yourself in order to complete writing projects or to share information in a teaching environment. Once again, although it requires discipline in order to do these things – especially to perfection status – great personal satisfaction will be the result.

Uranus is in Scorpio in the 5th house. Uranus represents the development of individuality and your ability to question authority. Scorpio is motivated by the need to live life passionately, to the fullest – as if all you had was today. In this need to live life to the fullest, Scorpio isn’t afraid to look at the taboo areas of life – those areas that most people don’t want to think or talk about. These include death, sex, deep psychological wounds, ghosts/spirits, magic and the mysterious aspects of life. Scorpio also has intuitive, almost psychic, abilities – especially the ability to see into other people’s minds and motivations. With Uranus in Scorpio, you likely have a unique view on some of these things, as well as some unusual gifts in this realm. Living life fully and passionately helps you to develop and express your individuality. There may be some collective views on these taboo topics that you feel the need to question authority about.
The 5th house is the House of Creative Expression and Joy. It includes all experiences with the expression of your creativity – including dancing, singing, performing, etc. And it includes any experiences of leisure activity and play, as well as dating. With Uranus in this house, the expression of your creativity must be totally individualized. You would have a very difficult time with any authority figure that tried to tell you how to express yourself creatively. This is your area of life to ‘rebel’ against structure and to have complete freedom of expression of your individual self. With Scorpio in this house, your individual style of creative expression will be very passionate and uninhibited. It is in this area of life that you feel the need to live life to the fullest and to base your actions completely on your feelings, rather than your intellect. Aside from creative expression, you are also able to live life passionately and independently when you are participating in leisure activities that allow you to play and have fun. Dating can also bring out this passionate side of you, although your individuality must once again stay intact or you may feel the need to rebel. Dating, along with playtime and creative expression, should provide the opportunity for you to live life to the fullest, passionately, even recklessly. You would appreciate the unexpected and the unusual in your dating experiences – or you may be the one providing the unexpected and the unusual.

Monica's Birth Chart Analyzation - Part 3 (South Node and Inner Planets)

2010-07-19T22:19:00.000-07:00

What we look at next is called your South Node. The South Node is not a planet, but functions somewhat like one. What it is literally is the point where the moon crosses the earth’s orbit. There is a south point and a north point. The South Node represents what qualities and characteristics you brought with you into this life from your pre-mortal experience, so these qualities and ways of being are totally 2nd nature to you and they underlie everything else in the birth chart. The North Node is the opposite, and points to those ways of being that were most foreign to you at birth, but which you need to stretch yourself to develop. This will be discussed later. Your South Node is in the sign of Pisces. Pisces shows that you came into this life as someone who is naturally attuned to the spiritual world, or at least the world of imagination. Pisces has the desire and ability to live life in a form of altered consciousness. This can be played out in many variations, but the true purpose of Pisces is to live life experiencing the spiritual dimension as part of your everyday reality, and seeing everything and everyone through your spiritual ‘lenses’. You have the natural ability to see the true nature of people behind the masks they wear. You know that each person is a spiritual expression & creation of divinity, a child of God, experiencing a mortal existence. This ability gives you compassion for others. You also can feel what it’s like to be in their shoes, which brings you empathy and the desire to carry other people’s burdens for them. Pisces is a water sign, increasing your intuitive abilities, imagination, and giving you the capacity for deep feelings – especially deep unconditional love for others. Pisces’ sensitivity is a sensitivity to subtle perceptions, including the ability to ‘see,’ ‘hear,’ and ‘feel’ things that exist in the unseen world – the world of energy and the world of spirit. This is a natural attunement for you. This ability often motivates Pisces toward spiritual practices such as meditation, prayer, or other experiences that increase your connection to God and spiritual things. Pisces is a mutable sign, making you more adaptable to people and circumstances, and able to flow with change when it happens.
As mentioned, you enjoy living life in an altered state of consciousness. Aside from the spiritual realm, many Pisceans are drawn to the world of fantasy and imagination. This allows you to live in a magical world where anything is possible. Pisceans tend to have lots of dreams at night, since this is a way the soul enjoys experiencing another state of consciousness. You may also have day-dreams and enjoy living in your mind and imagination. Sometimes a tendency is to drift through life and not act because you’re too busy living in your day-dreams.
Pisces in the negative state – a state where the soul feels disconnected from God – sometimes turns to escapist behavior. Whether it’s food, movies, books, or substance abuse, Pisces can turn to ways to escape reality because of an emptiness felt in the soul, and seeks the altered states of consciousness afforded by these things. The key for you if you ever find yourself in this state, is to reconnect to God and fill your soul with spiritual experiences.

Aside from the South Node, you also have Venus in Pisces. Venus represents the development of your ability to form emotional bonds with other people. Being in Pisces, you bond with other people when you feel a soul connection between you. It really helps when you feel that there is a higher, spiritual meaning behind you meeting each other. This is true for friends, acquaintances, and lovers. You may be considered an idealist in this way. You want your connection with other people, especially lovers and soul-mates, to be almost other-worldly and fantasy-like. Being with them can feel like an escape from the world. You can also bond with people through a conscious choice to participate in spiritual activities or discussions together, or participating in other Piscean-type activities together such as day-dreaming, reading fantasy, experiencing the world of energy or other dimensions of experience. You have the capacity to love deeply in your relationships with others, and need that deep, unconditional love in return. You also have empathy for those you are close to, and may seek to carry their burdens or at least be there for them however you can. The real purpose behind Venus in Pisces is to learn to see into the soul of others and find the beauty there.
Venus in Pisces is in the 9th house – The House of Travel & Higher Learning. The experiences of this house relate to avoiding monotony, both physically and mentally. Therefore, any experiences that allow you to mix up your regular routine are helpful for you and allow you to increase your bond with other people. When seeking to develop close bonds with people, it is not good for you to do the same things all the time. You need this mixing up of routine, the adding of new experiences, to enhance the closeness of your bond. Travel is included in this house, as this is one way to mix up routine and to expand your field of experience. Exposure to other cultures and viewpoints is also included in this house – anything that helps your mind to experience something new. The activities of this house help you to grow through constant new experiences, and it is these new experiences that allow you to develop your ability to bond with other people through establishing soul connections. This means that you may bond with people, develop closer relationships, or meet & make new soul connections with people when you travel and expand your field of experiences. Ninth House experiences are comfortable and natural to you, since this is the house your South Node is in, so you may actually feel comfortable and at home in places that you travel.

Mercury and Mars are both in Aries, but occupy different houses. Mercury represents the development of your intellect and ability to communicate. Mars represents your ability to assert yourself and take action in your life. Aries is motivated by the need to develop courage through constantly challenging the self. Mercury in Aries shows that you are driven to challenge yourself in your intellectual development, as well as in your ability to express yourself and communicate. This could show up as a drive to reach higher education, or to constantly challenge your mind to learn new things and stretch it beyond previous limits. You may also seek to challenge yourself in the realm of communication by speaking in public, or in writing things and having the courage to share them with others. Aries brings qualities of boldness, directness, and honesty, as well as feistiness, to your communication. You may have to work up the courage to say some things, but when they come out you can speak with boldness and honesty. There is power behind your words, and you can speak with this power and conviction when you choose, moving people to believe in your words. Though if Aries energy turns into anger, you can speak passionately about that as well.
Mercury in Aries is in the 9th house. Being in the 9th house, it is definitely likely that you enjoy challenging your intellect with higher learning. Your mind is expanded and comes alive as you expose yourself to foreign ideas and cultures, and you have the courage to constantly re-evaluate your beliefs in order to make sure they are in alignment with truth. Travel also expands your mind and allows you opportunities to develop your communication skills. Maybe you will be a speaker or writer who travels around sharing information.

Mars is at home in Aries, as Mars’ need to act and assert itself is combined with Aries’ powerful will to challenge the self and act directly and boldly. This gives you the ability to take assertive action in your life and to make things happen. You are likely accomplished in some area of your life. With Mars in the 10th house – The House of Career & Public Identity – this is likely the area where you are most accomplished and able to make things happen. You enjoy a challenge in your career field, and likely wouldn’t be happy once a career begins to stagnate. You are able to assert yourself in whatever role you have within your career, and are not afraid to step it up to the next level if you want. Mars points to what things energize you, and challenging yourself in your career definitely does that for you, though any activity in the public eye can do this as well. We talked earlier about your Sun in Taurus in the 10th house, and how that could show musicianship and public performance. Mars in Aries would add to this ability and give you the courage for public performance, as well as adding to your need to challenge yourself in this way, and to be bold and put yourself ‘out there’ to be seen. Aries is a fire sign and has fiery, passionate energy, therefore you are ignited into a passionate state of being when you are developing this aspect of yourself. However, if you are not developing this side of yourself, or if you are passing up chances to challenge yourself, your passion may die and your ability to take action in your life could die with it. Or once again, Aries passion could ignite when you are angry and either be expressed through bold action, or fester under the surface waiting to explode. It’s best to channel your Aries energy into courage-building, challenging activities in order to give this energy a healthy outlet.
One last thing about Mars is that, along with showing what energizes you and how you assert yourself, it also shows what attracts you to a mate or potential lover, and what keeps the passion alive in the relationship. With Mars in Aries, you are initially attracted to people with Aries qualities of boldness & directness, such as a man who pursues you and doesn’t give up the chase until he catches you. A man with confidence in his ability to win you over. You appreciate when a man shows the courage to tell you what he thinks of you, and speaks with boldness in the relationship. Aries is a very masculine energy, and you are attracted to a man who acts like a man and fulfills his male role, allowing you to revel in your femininity. You enjoy flirtation and feistiness in a relationship, and are energized by a bit of play fighting - tackling, wrestling, etc. This action-packed side of the relationship is helpful in keeping the passion alive for you. You may also enjoy the constant challenge of ‘winning each other over’ - keeping the thrill of the chase, of constantly winning your lover’s heart and he winning yours, alive. Mars in Aries shows the potential for a fulfilling passionate side to your relationship.

Monica's Birth Chart Analyzation - Part 2 (Ascendant & 1st House)

2010-07-13T19:12:00.001-07:00

At the time you were born, the sign of Cancer was coming up on the horizon. This makes Cancer your Rising sign, or Ascendant. The Ascendant makes up the 3rd part of your core personality, along with the Sun and Moon signs. Some say the Ascendant shows your social personality, or what people see upon first meeting you or before they really get to know you. Cancer is a water sign, and is therefore more in tune to the realm of subtle feelings and imagination. Cancer is one of the most sensitive signs of the zodiac. Like a crab without its shell, Cancer would be easily crushed if it didn’t have some form of defense mechanism. Therefore, Cancers operate by constructing some form of ‘shell’ around them. With this being your initial social personality, others are likely to first see you as someone who is somewhat guarded, unwilling to let others see into your deeper self until you feel them out and decide if it is safe to open up. This is especially true with potential lovers, since the affairs of the heart are the most risky when it comes to putting your heart out there. Your feelings are so sensitive, that the slightest remark or action against you personally can crush you. And yet, the underlying motivation for Cancer is to shed the shell that armors you against life’s pain and harsh realities, and to learn to love and to trust all that life has to offer you. The trick for you is to find friends and lovers who are trustworthy and with whom you can feel safe opening up. The loving, kind people who will guard your sensitivity for you by never saying or doing anything to crush you are the kind of people you want to surround yourself with. You don’t bounce back easily from those who do crush you with insensitivity, and it is those moments that your shell is reinforced. So, the key is to discern when it is important to guard yourself and when it is safe to bring down that guard and let others in. Those who get past your guard will find a loving, nurturing person who would do anything for those she loves.
With your Sun in Taurus and Moon in Aquarius, you may resent this part of yourself for being so sensitive since you hate drama so much, and are naturally more emotionally detached.

The ruler of the Ascendant is the next thing we look at. Each sign has a planetary ruler, and the ruler of the Ascendant is a focal point in the chart. The ruler of Cancer is the Moon. Therefore, the Moon is considered the ruler of your chart. This gives you qualities of the Moon, and emphasizes the sign that the Moon occupies. The Moon increases your water element, enhancing feelings, intuition, and imagination. The Moon gives you a soft heart and nurturing qualities like those of Cancer. However, the Moon is in the sign of Aquarius, as discussed earlier, and the Moon’s placement here is emphasized. Looking back on this, we see Aquarius’s tendency to analyze every feeling before actually feeling it, showing the tendency to live more in your head than your heart. With the Moon as your ruler, we are going to see constantly shifting moods, like the tides of the ocean, but being in an air sign, most of the feelings that are shifting your moods will be just below the surface – present but waiting for analysis before they can surface. In any given day you could go through a number of different moods, and not be exactly sure why. The moods can shift faster than you are able to mentally understand and analyze, since many of the moods don’t have a logical explanation and are therefore difficult to analyze. If your Moon was in a water sign, the shifts in your mood would be much more visible to other people as they watch you go from crying, to angry, to contemplative, to happy, to inspired, etc., but the air sign doesn’t allow you to easily show each of these emotions. You want to understand why you feel the way you do before you are willing to express it, which often just puts you in a seeming state of neutrality, and yet the moods continue to shift within you where no one can see. On the positive side, the qualities of Aquarius itself are emphasized in you, adding to your uniqueness and unconventional ways.

Next we look at planets and signs in the 1st house, as these are near the Ascendant and are also emphasized parts of the chart. You have Jupiter in Leo in the 1st house, and Jupiter is very close to rising with the Ascendant. First off, this gives you qualities of Jupiter itself – expansive, philosophical, a risk taker, the tendency to think big, enthusiasm for life, and optimism (when those moods aren’t getting in the way). Jupiter represents the development of your ability to have faith in life and in yourself. It points to those ways of being that lift your spirits and increase your vitality and faith in life. Being in Leo, you are someone who is uplifted by the pure expression of personality. Leos have a child-like quality of playfulness, and love to laugh and have fun. Creativity for you is a pure spontaneous expression. You are uplifted as you show others what it means to keep the freshness of youth alive, and to celebrate every chance you get. With Jupiter in Leo, you think big when it comes to parties and celebrations, and are likely a good hostess. You love to spoil those you love, making them feel like kids on Christmas morning whenever you can. You enjoy participating in the fun activities of life – dancing, partying, traveling, going to amusement parks, etc., anything that you consider to be fun. Leos have an excellent sense of humor that borders on silliness. Leos enjoy performing or being in the spotlight, and thrive on praise and applause – not in a prideful way, but in the way a child thrives on encouragement and praise, and luckily with Jupiter here you likely get it. With Jupiter in Leo, anything you do in the creative realm is going to be blessed and successful, as Jupiter shows what areas of life we have gifts and ‘luck’.

The 1st house is the House of Self or the House of Personality. First of all, this is very fitting for the sign of Leo, which is all about expression of personality. But the real developmental process happening here is the development of vitality and a personal philosophy through the experiences that help you understand yourself better, and that help you understand personality itself. All things that increase your personal self-awareness help you develop this Jupiter in Leo aspect of yourself. The study of personality theories and psychology is one field that will really increase your development. With Jupiter in this house it is likely that your studies will not be focalized or minor, but that you will stretch your mind to encompass personality theory on a grand scale, seeking to bring together all that you find into one personalized philosophy. Helping others, especially youth, to understand themselves through your philosophy will add great joy to your life and give you faith in yourself that you never knew. On a smaller scale, the 1st house represents experiences that help you develop your interests and allow you to make time for yourself. Jupiter in Leo here shows that the creative, joyful side of life is something you need to make time for. Knowing yourself and your Leo gifts will allow you to express them with confidence and to find great joy in this area of your life.

Monica's Birth Chart Analyzation - Part 1 (Sun & Moon Sign)

2010-07-05T15:52:00.000-07:00

I wanted to show what it is I do by analyzing my own birth chart for you. The full birth chart can be up to 12 pages long, so it will take a few different blog posts to post my full birth chart. This post contains my Sun in Taurus and Moon in Aquarius. I will be analyzing it as if I was doing it for someone else.

The Sun was in the sign of Taurus when you were born. The planets represent functions of the brain that are being developed, and the signs show us the motivation behind that development, as well as qualities and characteristics that help in that development. With the Sun we are looking at the development of your basic self-image, and the ways in which you find your place in the world. Being in Taurus, you are motivated by the need for inner peace and security. This means that as a Taurus, you don’t naturally feel peaceful and secure, but your actions will be based around your need to obtain these things. In the attempt to find peace, you are likely to avoid conflict or confrontations of any kind, to stay clear of drama situations, and to keep your thoughts to yourself. You are naturally a very deep person, but peace is found in simplicity, so you strive to find ways to calm the chatter of your mind and to bring yourself into the present moment. The avoidance of conflict and drama only bring outward peace, so it is important for you to find activities that will help you find peace within. Ways that help a Taurus to do this is to spend time in nature, sitting by a stream, sitting under a tree in the park, or anywhere that is calming and rejuvenating. Taurus in an earth sign and needs this connection to nature in order to feel re-energized and at peace within.
Another Taurus activity that helps in the obtaining of peace is playing music. Many Taureans are musicians. It is a natural talent for many of you, and the reason for this is that in the moment when you are playing music, all mental chatter is quieted as you fully embody the music you are playing.
And another Taurean strategy for finding peace is to bask in physical touch. There is nothing so nurturing to a Taurus’s soul than the relaxation that comes from the touch of another human being – whether it be in getting a massage, or cuddling with a lover, touch is essential. The hard part is that many Taureans don’t want to burden others in their request for touch, and their tendency to keep things to themselves will often keep them from getting this need fulfilled. Make sure you don't fall into this self-imposed trap. Ask for the touch you need.
The other motivation for Taurus is to find security. As I said, this means that Taureans don’t naturally feel secure – outwardly or inwardly. It is likely that you have struggled with feeling insecure throughout your life, or at least at times. In your attempts to find security you may be very resistant to change when what you know and what you have been doing have been working well enough for you. To let go and move onto something new really tests your ability to feel secure within, since your outer security is being threatened. Often Taureans will hold on tightly to material security in whatever form they can because that represents at least some form of reliable security in life. The real test for Taureans is to find a deep inner security in knowing who you are, that is unshakeable. Life will keep testing you in this area, and it’s up to you to discover your worth and believe in it enough so those moments that threaten your security aren’t able to knock you down.
As you do those necessary things in order to find inner peace and security in your life, you will begin to feel confident in your self-image, and will be able to find your place in the world. You have Taurean gifts of patience, practicality, a live & let live attitude, dependability, and a reverence for life. You seek to be infinitely complex, and yet simple, to be unfathomably deep, and yet feel no need to talk about it. You shine in these qualities. Taurus is a fixed sign, which is part of what makes you so dependable. You will stick to things you start and follow through with them. When you decide on something, you are in for the long haul, and it is often difficult to get you to let go and change your plans once they are set. Taureans are known for their stubbornness, but that stubbornness is also a great gift, making you very grounded and stable.

Your Sun in Taurus is in the 10th house – the House of Career and Public Identity. Houses represent areas of life that you are drawn to, or areas that life puts you in, that assist in the development of that planet sign combination. So in this case, you are drawn to a career life, especially one that puts you in the public eye. Your Sun sign in the 10th house makes this Taurus side of you the most visible to others. It is within your career or public identity that you have the opportunity to develop your self-image through peace and security-seeking activities. You are likely the most secure when you are in a career you love, especially one that influences the public in some way. Your career helps you to find your place in the world, and it is within this area of life that you feel the strongest sense of self identity. The Sun shows where you shine in life, and it is in the public eye where you shine the most. You would do well as either a leader in your field, or as a public example of your chosen field.
With Taurus in the 10th house, you may also be drawn to be a musician who performs publicly. You may enjoy a career in the music field. Massage therapy, or some other career involving physical touch (physical therapy, hands on healing, etc.) would also fit. Many Taureans are also natural counselors, and this would be a fitting career as well. Anything relating to the physical body - such as the health field - or nature related – such as a gardener, veterinarian, or wilderness guide - would also be fitting for this earth sign. Though Taurus enjoys material comforts and may not enjoy roughing it in the wilderness.

Your Moon is in the sign of Aquarius. The Moon represents the development of your inner life, your ability to feel and respond emotionally. It also points to what activities nurture you on a deep level. Looking at Aquarius, your inner life is motivated by the need to attain freedom and individuality. Aquarius is an air sign, and is therefore more detached emotionally, sifting through feelings on a mental level before they are ever actually felt. This makes feeling and responding emotionally slightly delayed as the mind sifts through and analyzes everything that is happening first. Aquarius seeks to be free, and therefore struggles against emotional entanglements. Your inner life is nurtured and developed by activities that allow you to follow your own sense of individuality, and to not conform to others expectations or social pressures. If you find yourself conforming to what others think you should be doing or being, your inner self will begin to die and you will become nothing but a shell of a person. The Moon is the heart of a person, and a sense of freedom is necessary for your heart to feel alive. As you discover who you are and what you believe in, your convictions are so strong that others will not be able to dissuade you. It is important that you allow yourself to have these convictions, as they are what make you the individual that you are. Out of all the signs, Aquarius has the least need to fit in with society. However, Aquarius loves social gatherings and needs to surround itself with friends and associates who support them in their unique way of thinking and living.
As an Aquarius Moon, you are very independent, both in mind and in action. You are very forward thinking, and many Aquarians are on the leading edge of science and new fields of thought and discovery. Once again, Aquarius is a fixed sign, increasing your stubbornness about your convictions, and making you unbending about the beliefs you have discovered in your commitment to uncovering the truth.

Your Moon in Aquarius is in the 7th house – the House of Partnerships & Marriage. This is a tricky place for this planet/sign combination. First off, like I said, the Moon is your heart. This means that in order for your heart to be fulfilled, and your inner life to be developed and nurtured, you need to be in a partnership of some kind. The tricky part, is that Aquarius is so freedom-loving and independent, that partnerships are often difficult for you. Remember though that partnerships can include best friends, as well as lovers. And the purpose of these partnerships is to help you develop your ability to feel and respond emotionally – in your Aquarius way of course.
So as partnerships come into your life, you will be given the opportunity to develop your inner self through expressing your unique individuality. Best friends who come along will be key in this development process, but they must support you in your uniqueness and unconventionality, and give you a fair amount of freedom to be you. Overly dominating friends, or friends who tag along and don't give you space would not do well with you. Both would feel confining and would create the need in you to break free. The same holds true with romantic partnerships. These romantic partners are also there to help you develop a more fulfilling inner life by allowing you the chance to express your unique self within that partnership. But these partnerships must not be overly possessive or suffocating to you. They must also not be overly dominating and controlling. Either of these types of lovers will stimulate your need to break free and end the relationship, or at least distance yourself.
What you are learning in this process is first, partnerships are necessary for you in order to have a fulfilling inner life. Second, partnerships are not meant to make you into the other person, but to liberate you to be yourself more fully. Freedom and perfect individuality within partnerships is the ultimate goal. This means allowing the friendship of the relationship to be the strongest binding force.

One more thing to point out about the Moon in the 7th house, is that any planet in the 7th house is one in which you don't develop without the help of a partner, and sometimes you are drawn to partners who reflect that planet's quality. In this case, qualities of the Moon - the ability to feel and respond emotionally, someone who is in touch with their feelings and is comfortable expressing them, someone who is sensitive and loving. You might be drawn to a partner who is very in touch with their feelings, and this is ok, sometimes very helpful in making you realize that you aren't naturally that way and need help being that way. Sometimes though, we allow our partner to live out those qualities for us, and don't seek to develop them ourselves, and that is a tendency with any planet in the 7th house. So make sure you use that opportunity, if it comes along, to become more in touch with your feelings and more able to express them. Also, with your Aquarian Moon, it might be difficult with someone who is too Moon-like, because they may be the ones who are overly attached and possessive, which would cause you to want to break free. So make sure that if you have a partner who is in touch with their feelings and is soft and loving, that they also understand your need for friendship and freedom within the relationship, as we've made it clear that you need.

New Direction

2010-06-29T12:27:00.000-07:00

So most of you know that I quit my job at the end of May. I've been being led since the first of this year that I would be done with my job at Dave's soon, and then in May I knew I needed to be done at the end of the month - even though I didn't know exactly what I was going to be doing next and how I would be making money. All I knew was that it was time to start living my true purpose. My true purpose involves using my skills to assist people in understanding themselves and their life path and how to live their fullest life. After that, I then want to assist people in understanding their relationships and how to make them work. This will involve some schooling, and some experience of my own obviously. However, I feel like I know the mechanics of how to make relationships work, I just haven't been given the opportunity to really apply everything I know yet, and I know I have some blocks of my own to clear. Still, I feel like I have information that would really help people with their relationships, at least in understanding each other's needs, and the needs of their particular relationship.
Anyway, so I am working on a website to begin my new business, but until then I am just advertising it through my blog and through word of mouth. Basically, I am doing birth chart interpretations for people. This means taking the chart that shows the position of all the planets in the sky at the very minute a person was born, and interpreting it according to the skills I have developed, giving a person a deeper understanding of all of their inner motivations, gifts, and personality characteristics, helping them understand why they are the way they are, why the feel the way they do, and how to fully express all aspects of themselves for a more fulfilled life.
I have been doing birth charts for family and friends (and a few clients) for 5 years now, and have only had amazingly positive feedback from every one of them. I enjoy doing this for people, though it takes me a good 4-6 hours to interpret and type up a person's birth chart. Doing these lengthy charts for people for free has worn on me and made me hesitant to continue doing them. People are telling me that I need to charge for them, and that people will pay what they're worth. I have been working to come up with some simpler charts to make the process quicker, though it will be less complete. Some people don't want the full 6-12 pages. I am also working on doing audio recordings for people. It would take less time for me to do that, and some people would rather listen to it than read it. Though I'm still an advocate of the full written interpretation - as my skills in writing are much more advanced than my verbal skills.
On the side of this business, I have begun to create Empowerment Jewelry. This is jewelry that contains both gemstones and affirmation statements to support you in becoming the person you want to be. I can do life purpose statements - as in a word that embodies the title you feel your life encompasses, or should encompass. An example of that would be "Artist" or "Healer," etc. Then I can also do powerful statements of being that you want to embody, such as "Abundant" or "Blissful" or "Loving." I will do a lot of this jewelry by request.
On top of this, I am working on learning energy work in order to assist people in removing blocks in the physical, emotional, mental, or spiritual level of their being. I would love to practice on anyone for free right now. By the end of the summer I should feel competent enough to do this more professionally.
I also intend to work with a few other professionals who have a similar business as my own, working together to create a full Life Purpose Coaching system. Prices are in the works, but if you are interested in anything I am doing, let me know and I will discuss prices with you.

The Teeth Regrowing Project

2010-03-16T19:02:00.000-07:00

It has been a good 8 months since I last wrote in this blog, but I have used those months to continue practicing and perfecting my muscle testing skills. I have used it with clients, friends, family, and myself, and so many times it has proved itself accurate. It is amazing how specific you can get with the supplements that your body tests for and the exact amount it wants in any given moment.
Because of this ability I have been able to put together very specific health programs for my clients, and though it has been more time consuming, I've felt so much more confident in my recommendations.
I've really appreciated the ability to test for myself and be so much more self-sufficient in knowing what my body needs. Some of you know that I have had a problem with teeth cavities. There are a couple of my teeth that are pretty bad, as in the dentists would say they need a cap. Well, I have been very opposed to that idea. I just can't agree that there is only one option when teeth get cavities. I know deep down in my being that there is a natural solution - a way to grow teeth back. Aside from the fact that I'm not in a position to spend the same amount of money on my teeth that I would spend on buying a car, I just have to find a way.
Probably 7 months ago I decided to put together a program for my teeth to help rebuild them by muscle testing what supplements my body needed for that. As I muscle tested, I was told that it would take at least 4 months to see any difference in my teeth. My problem was that I was taking a whole lot of other supplements for other things at the time, so adding a teeth program ended up being too much for me to keep up with and I didn't stick to my program strictly for long enough to see a difference, though there were a few things I kept taking the full 4 months, and I was told that my teeth looked stronger and healthier by my friend. After that I gave up on all supplements for a good 4 months. I sort of wore myself out and I didn't want to take anything for anything, so I've been taking a break since then.
Well, I am realizing how important it is to get back on a program for my teeth, and since I'm not taking any other supplements right now it is a perfect time to get going on it.
I want to keep a log of what I'm taking and the progress I see over the next 7 1/2 months - which is how long it's telling me that it will take. I would love anyone who's reading this to share their encouragement and support, and to hold me to my commitment to this program.
The first step is to halt the tooth decay that is occurring in a couple of my teeth. Research and muscle testing reveal that tooth decay is due to a bacterial infection in the mouth that also enters the bloodstream, so my focus now is to stop the decay process through a series of supplements that kill infection, reduce inflammation, restore the good bacteria, and stop degeneration of tissue. What I have come up with for this first step is to use the following supplements:

Goldenseal Herb - kills infection in the bloodstream
Turmeric & Bromelain - Reduces inflammation
Dentizyme - a combination of herbs that kill bacteria in the mouth
Vitamin E - a powerful antioxidant, and immune enhancer
Rosehips - a natural source of vitamin C which fights infection
Probiotic Smile - a lozenge that restores good bacteria in the mouth, which keeps bad bacteria in check
Thuja homeopathic - stops the decay process
Teeth Loose homeopathic combination - strengthens teeth at the roots
Flax Oil - Pulls impurities from the teeth, important for strong nerves, reduces inflammation
Energy Work - done by my sister Julie in order to restore full energy flow to my teeth and remove any emotional or energetic blocks to the healing process
Calcium Sulphate 6x - supports detoxification of the body
Calcium Fluoride 6x - prevents tooth decay and strengthens enamel
SAMe - an amino acid that protects the teeth from damage on a cellular level

Then a few other nutritive supplements to begin the restorative process:

Hydrilla - an excellent plant source of calcium to strengthen the teeth
Trace Minerals - to help with the utilization of calcium, and to help with the electrical nerve impulses to the teeth

And, aside from these supplements, I am told to work on my faith to be healed.

It seems like a lot to be taking, but I'm gathering these supplements a little at a time and beginning them as I get them. I also think that if I am fully focused on one program, no matter how many things I'm taking for it, I will be able to stick with it. I am committed to helping my teeth naturally, because the alternative is expensive and may involve losing my tooth/teeth altogether.

Feel free to add suggestions that I could muscle test for if you think something else would be helpful.

Wish me luck and send encouragement!

A New Skill

2009-06-15T15:29:00.001-07:00

I have finally developed a skill that I have wanted for a long time! Muscle testing!!! There has been a lady at my work who is really good at it, and she has been giving me confidence in my ability to learn this. I have gotten together with her and had her muscle test a bunch of things for me, especially to help me confirm the things I see in people's eyes when I take their eye pictures. I have learned a lot from her help she's given me - both in studying the eyes, and in learning to trust that muscle testing can be easy.
There are lots of ways to do muscle testing, and part of the trick is finding the way that works best for you. Most people know the way where you put your arm out straight and then ask a question. Another person pushes down on your arm, and if it stays strong, the answer is yes, if the muscle goes weak, it's a no. That way is the least convenient in my opinion, because you always need another person present in order to test. I have also used the way where you hold up a supplement to your sternum, asking if you need that product, and if it's a yes you go forward, if it's a no you go backward. But that has only been helpful when testing myself, and is not always easy to feel.
The lady at work has shown me a couple of other ways to test. One is to lock your thumb and middle finger together on one hand, making a circle, then using your pointer finger and thumb of the other hand to try and break the other two finger. If it stays strong it's a yes, if it breaks it's a no. That is her way of doing it, but has been harder for me to learn. Another way is to rub your thumb and pointer finger together lightly. If the fingers stick it's a yes, if they stay smooth it's a no. I have actually been able to do that one sometimes and been accurate. But the testing that is working the most consistently for me is using a pendulum. For awhile there I couldn't understand how to make it work. It just wouldn't do anything for me. See, you hold a pendulum over your hand and ask questions. For me, if the answer is yes it moves in a clockwise motion, if it's no it just stops moving. I couldn't figure out how to get it to move for me, and I don't know what really changed in me, but suddenly I can always get it to move. Maybe I just had to have a stronger belief in my ability to learn this, and I have that now. Sometimes I have to just ask the right questions, but it has been really fun to have this tool to check in with when I need to find out if there's a supplement my body needs. I've had my friend at work double check my answers, and they are most always verified by her testing.
It is really liberating to finally have this skill, and I feel like I can be a much more effective counselor by not only using the knowledge I have, but also by using a tool to test what products are going to work best for a person, and which areas are their priority to work on. It's like using my head and my heart - knowledge and the spirit.

Yea!

The Dancing Dating Problem

2009-05-30T10:10:00.001-07:00

To date a dance partner would be the greatest thing I can imagine, yet it is also the most risky thing to do, and there seems to be many roadblocks to ever getting to that point.
To date a dance partner would be to share in my most favorite activity with a person who means the most to me. Dancing with someone you care about is an experience that creates a connection unlike any other that I have experienced. Dating a dance partner takes my favorite activity and elevates the level of fun up 100 notches. And it means the world to me to have the person I care about understand and participate in this part of my life.
Dating someone who doesn't dance creates a conflict in me - like having to choose between your two best friends.
The element of risk in dating a dance partner comes in the form of the possibility of a break-up. When you break up with a dance partner, it's like losing both of your best friends at once. You lose your partner, and you suddenly have a painful connection to the dance floor. One or both of you must sacrifice some of your dancing nights in order to avoid seeing each other. And you not only lose the closeness you shared, but you no longer get to enjoy dancing with that partner.
But in the end I would prefer to date a dancer, even at the high risk. Getting there is the trickiest part...
The dancing scene consists of multiple men and women, trading partners throughout the night, playing and having a great time with each other. We are like a dancing family in a way. The dancers are our friends, and they are our necessary instrument which allows us to play the music called dancing. Each partner is a slightly different instrument - and while it is possible to stick to one instrument, most would agree that playing different instruments throughout the night adds needed variety and keeps things interesting and progressive. Aside from that, if all of the instruments are your friends which you have enjoyed playing with on the dance floor for years, to suddenly narrow yourself to one instrument is a difficult thing for you and for all of them. Thus, the following scenarios are created:
Dancers come into the dancing scene, we dance, we have fun. When you dance and are having fun together it is sometimes difficult to determine if that playfulness on the dance floor is flirting, or simply having fun with your dancing friend. As a woman, it is mostly my job to send signals if I am interested and wait for the man to ask me out. So I dance, I smile, we are playful, it's fun... does it look any different? Maybe I have a glimmer in my eyes when I smile at him. But, after the dance ends, you both go dance with another. You have fun with this other dancing friend, but you aren't interested in this one. However, the previous dance partner glances your way as you are dancing with the new partner, notices you having fun with that guy and thinks, "she's having a lot of fun with that guy too, maybe she's just that way with everyone, and I'm kidding myself that she'd be interested in me." She goes back to the previous partner, who she really is interested in, but this time he is slightly less playful, or maybe he's just as playful but after the dance ends he just leaves. She looks forward to seeing him again the next week - they dance, they have fun, she's even trying to flirt, but he now believes that it's just how she is when she dances, so this week he just leaves after dancing, and the next week too, and again, and again... enough time goes by that she begins to realize he's never going to ask her out. BUT, their relationship on the dance floor never changes. Being playful with this partner is the nature of their relationship.
A year or so down the road, a new guy comes on the dancing scene. They dance, they have fun, they start developing a fun friendship, they start to like each other - so she thinks, then the previous partner shows up, as he does on occasion now, they dance, and they don't know how to dance in any other way, except their playful banter. She worries a bit about the new guy, but to not be playful with the old dance partner would take considerable effort, and would make him think something was wrong. She goes back to the new guy, expecting to have a good time, but he's acting distant... was he just watching her with the old partner?? Not cool. Once again, she is thought of as the girl who is playful and flirtatious with everyone. She is slightly upset with the old partner because YES, she is even a bit interested in him still, but he will NEVER ask her out, so it is entirely pointless, and the potential with the new guy is wasted on him because now the new guy has the same view of her as the old guy - that he's not really special in her eyes. So the cycle continues with this guy...
So she tries something different. She meets a guy outside of dancing, who is interested in learning to dance. She invites him dancing with her. She spends most of the first while dancing with him, teaching him, being patient, etc. But all of her other instruments in her dance family want a dance or two with her, so she takes a break from the beginner and dances with a couple of the old instruments... the beginner begins to get intimidated, just a bit. She reassures him. Then, one of the cycled through interests from the dance scene asks her to dance. They have established a good friendship, but the element of interest has been there in the past, it is difficult to hide, even though nothing will ever happen between them. But the beginner, potential interest, sees this and whoa... that's it. He says he's done. He leaves. They don't go out again.
So she goes back to trying to date within the dancing scene. Maybe an interest from the past is reignited, or a new one comes around. It's playful, he really seems interested this time, but then she watches him dancing with the other women and thinks, "it seems like they get along better, she's really cute, I don't know if I have a chance compared to her... I wonder which one of us he will choose to walk out with after the dance ends." Maybe he does walk her out. Maybe they even appear to be dating?? But he is still playful with her, like nothing has changed...

My point in relaying these very real scenarios of the dancing dating scene is that I have no idea how to maneuver them with success. I'm sure I'm not alone in this struggle. There are really only a few answers previous dancers have come up with. The first, and most common: they find someone to date outside the dancing scene, don't come as often, and only bring them dancing on rare occasions, dancing solely with them. This scenario may prove the most successful in the dating scene, but kills the dancing family.
The second, and also common, answer to this is to just remain friends with everyone, and continue dancing, enjoying the multitude of dancing friendships, which has an element of fulfillment, but not complete satisfaction.
The third, and most coveted, answer is to establish the interest with your dance partner, both be mature enough to be forward about it, date, and make that clear at the dance club - so anyone who may have been an interest before now knows your status in the relationship. And, eventually to marry that partner. You share your dancing friends, cuz you were both friends with all of them before you dated. You invite them all to your wedding reception and have a big dance at the end, then you both continue to go dancing, dancing a lot with each other, but still enjoying your other dancing friends together.

I want the 3rd scenario. I really really do. Is it possible??? I meet a lot of great guys on the dance floor - 10 years worth of guys coming and going on the dance scene. But too many times the roadblocks stop it from ever getting anywhere. What is my role in getting through the roadblocks?? Do I need to do more than smile and be playful with the guy? Is it my role to be blunt and make it known? Is it too late after the guy already thinks you're just a flirt?

I bring this up now, because after my energy work sessions, I was suddenly emotionally open again, and someone I had thought was just a friend changed in my eyes... but the previous scenarios are threatening it already.

Dancing, Dancing, and more Dancing

2009-05-09T17:48:00.000-07:00

This week has been a dance-filled week, and it's not over. Instead of my regular 2 nights of dancing, I will have gone a total of 4 nights this week - burning off calories that I don't need to lose :).
The week started with a double dance night on Tuesday - west coast swing at my favorite place, the Murray Art Center, then when that ended I headed off to Studio 600 for their country night, since it was free Tuesday. It was a busy night, but somehow I managed to avoid being asked by anyone other than the 2 guys that came with me. It's strange to say that I am somewhat happy about that, yet I am surprised because that doesn't usually happen. The thing is, is that the other 200 people there haven't a clue how to dance without ripping my arms off, and one dance with one of them can put a damper on the night. I really don't understand how guys think that 'jerk and spin' is acceptable, especially if they were raised to believe that a man should treat a woman gentleman-like... the root of that word being GENTLE. If they only knew, a gentle lead is all it takes.
Next came Thursday night. I hadn't planned on dancing that night, in fact it was our sibling night. But I got a message saying I could help promote a new dance movie coming out this weekend by being at the dance club that night. I headed to sibling night, but left a little early to make it to this dance event. This was also taking place at Studio 600, but Thursday is their super busy night. There ended up being 5 couples from the west coast swing club there to do a demo - including me. Some of my very favorite dance partners were there! Having them at that club was a treat. The demo happened at the peak of the night, when there were easily 400-500 people there. They cleared everyone off the floor, and introduced west coast swing. We were promoting the dance, first off, to try and get people interested in it. Then the new movie "Love 'n Dancing" was promoted. This movie features a lot of the west coast dance pros who compete world-wide.
So, with everyone cleared off the floor, three of the west coast couples entered the spotlight and began to do their thing. Thirty seconds later me and my partner ran onto the floor and joined them, tearing it up as best we could. Then after a couple minutes we exited the floor, then entered again with a new partner. My partner this time threw some new moves at me that I wasn't expecting, and luckily my improvisation button was turned on, cuz I went with it and it turned out great! We got some cheers. Next I was stolen by another dance partner - got to dance a few seconds with him - then I was stolen again by my original partner. It was chaos at the end, but fun and entertaining.
Afterwards we stayed awhile and danced with eachother - once again managing to not get asked by any of the "jerk & spin" dancers at the club - hooray! I ended up leaving early though, wanting to preserve my strength for the following night.
Friday I got a big nap in after work, then headed out to meet up with my dancing friends in order to go see the movie "Love 'n Dancing". The dancing in the movie was great! The acting, ok. I enjoyed most of it, but thought they added some unnecessary gay and lesbian side characters.
After the movie we all headed to the Murray Art Center and had a blast dancing with all our favorite dancers. The only thing was that I had what felt like a pulled muscle in my gluteus maximus, and one guy did a lung with me, and OUCH!!! I was down for a few songs. I was limping most of the night, but still managed to dance clear up to the end. It's amazing what you can make your body do. I thanked it though, with a nice soak in the tub at 2am when I got home, and I'm doing much better today.
Tonight is the final dancing night of the week. Strangely I am not worn out or tired of dancing yet. I am, in fact, restless and wanting time to fly so I can go. Part of my dancing high has to do with some friends there that have been really fun to socialize with, and I'm looking forward to seeing them again. I have even been gathering some music, preparing to DJ one of these nights - possibly on a night I don't feel as much like dancing.
So I have been working hard this week, but also playing hard - and I have really been enjoying my week! I even dreamed about dancing last night, though it was a really crazy dream and some girl was being competitive with me and trying to embarrass me or make me look bad to the judges (cuz we were at a competition). The fun part was that I wasn't affected by her, and I was confident even with the embarrassing situation she put me in.

My dance lessons have been postponed a couple weeks due to my teacher getting sick last week, then being out of town this weekend. They will resume next Friday.

What a FUN FUN FUN week it has been.

Fun Happenings this Month, and Future Considerations

2009-03-30T12:48:00.000-07:00

It's been an eventful month! The most recent thing was our 3-day sale at Dave's. It was a crazy 3 days, but lots of fun. Our sale days are like a carnival, and this time all 3 days were equally busy. Aside from everything in the store being on sale, there is free food samples, free chair massages, free facial scanning (a machine that shows you where your skin is dry, oily, or sun damaged... and makes you look really scary!), free aura scanning, $10 hand analysis, and my $10 eye readings. The booths are so fun to have during the sale. Plus it helps people know what they need to buy. I got to read about 10 people's eyes in the 5 hours I was doing it. I really love my job. It's the best job I've ever had. I work with great people, I have a great boss, and I am valued there.

Aside from the sale, I got to attend a workshop this past month called Standing in Your Power. A lady came into my store telling me she kept having a strong feeling that she needed to tell me about this workshop. I wasn't sure how I'd pay for it, but a couple days before the workshop, the same lady called and told me she could bring someone for free and wanted to bring me! So I got to go. The workshop was really wonderful, and very hard to describe. Basically the workshop was led by a sweet, humble, Christ-like woman who taught us about what it means to Stand in Our Power - to stand as the person we are meant to be, the person we came here to be, realizing what our gifts are and moving through the blocks that keep us from being able to share our spiritual gifts. In a nutshell, our cells are able to be programmed the way a computer is programmed. We get programmed to believe certain things, which make us act certain ways. Some of these programs were passed down to us from our ancestors through generations, so some of the blocks we feel in our life are not even our own. She helped us clear some of those programs, and to give our cells new programs based on our true identity, which empower us to live our lives as the person we are meant to be, without anything blocking us on an emotional or spiritual level. It was really powerful. I felt some changes in myself just days after the workshop. I just started feeling more creative, and started seeing myself in a more spiritual light than I had been, my desires started being more spiritually-based. It was really neat.

Then, I mentioned at the sale day that we had a person doing hand analysis. I've never thought much of that before, but then in about 2 weeks, hand analysis came up in conversations and in a book I was reading and in the form of a lady who does them coming into our store... 4 times it came up! When that happens, I usually take notice that maybe it's something I should look into. So I worked out a trade with this lady - an eye reading for a hand analysis. It was actually really fascinating. This lady who had never met me before described me perfectly by looking at my hand. I love anything having to do with personality analysis and gaining a deeper insight into myself and why I act the way I do, and what my purpose is... so this was just one more thing that gave some insight and clarity. She nailed some of my gifts, and my main struggle in life. I think it is fascinating the way the Lord has created us, so that our life is even written upon the palms of our hands. The neat thing is that she said the lines on your hands can change as you make different choices in your life. In other words, hand reading is not a predictive tool which tells you your future and doesn't change... nothing like that. If anything, it tells your past and what you're dealing with presently. If you change, so will the markings in your hands over time. Pretty cool.

Well, this upcoming month is bringing a lot of things with it. First is Conference... then Easter - and a talk I am giving that day... then my 30th b-day... then a class I am teaching at Young Living on Iridology. Lots of preparation I have to do, and lots of celebrating.
Thirty is a milestone year, so I feel like I should do something different this year. I know I've had big parties most of the past 5 years or so... but this birthday needs something a little more special. Kind of like your golden anniversary. I think that transitioning into my 30s doesn't have to be something negative, like so many people see it as. I don't think that you are old when you are 30, despite popular belief. I have watched all of my siblings go through their 30s looking as young and beautiful as ever. If anything, it is the prime of life. My 20s were full of lots of really fun and lots of really difficult times as I came into myself, and learned about who I really was. The only challenge now as I look into my 30s is to make sure I don't lose the ability to feel excitement for life. If anything, I am more established, educated, experienced, traveled... and my 30s can be a time of harnessing this knowledge and experience and turning it into something that I can give back to the world - whether in the form of a book, a new business, a recorded song... or hopefully also in the form of the creation of my own family unit where I can combine my knowledge & experience with someone else, and teach it to our children. My only requirement of myself this next decade is to rekindle my child-like excitement for life, and to live every moment to the fullest with gratitude.

It Was Just a Thought, But It Was Heard

2009-02-26T15:44:00.000-08:00

Life is so interesting isn't it. And how powerful a thought is. Lately I keep noticing things happening for me that I had just thought about earlier that day. Random thoughts that I think, I guess in the affirmative, and then let go, not expecting anything and not being attached to the thought because maybe it wasn't that important. Then later that day the opportunity I'd thought of presents itself. For instance, I had wanted to have an appointment with my boss Dave for a quick consultation/discussion of some things. I had scheduled myself for today, but yesterday a lady called and sounded desperate to see Dave, and everything was full for today, so I gave up my appointment to her, thinking that it wasn't that important for me to see him. Then this morning I kind of had the thought in my head that I could still get to meet with him somehow, maybe if an appointment didn't show up or something, but I didn't put much energy into the thought, I just thought about how that was possible. Well during the day Dave actually invited me into his office to tell me something, and then asked what was up with me. I actually chose not to get into anything I'd planned to for some reason, and then afterwards when I left for home I was thinking "hey, that was my opportunity that I thought of, why didn't I take advantage of it?" Kind of silly how we don't always realize in the moment that the desires of our heart that we've asked for are being answered, even when it's totally obvious.
Another example is with these detox footbaths that I do for people, there are a few people who bought a package of 10 footbaths back in September and have only used up like 3 of them. Well, I don't allow myself to use the money they paid me for them until they've used up their footbaths, so I kept thinking that maybe I should call these people and ask if they want to set up an appointment. Well, I didn't call them, but I kept thinking about how I wanted these people to finish their footbaths, and within this past week 2 of those clients have set up more than one appointment to use up their footbaths! Amazing!
This has happened to me multiple times in the past couple weeks or so with different types of things. It always seems to surprise me, yet not. It made me think today about how every thought and desire of our heart is a prayer, even when we don't consciously make them into a prayer, and those 'prayers' are still heard and answered for us all the time. Then why do we ever choose to be in a place of struggle? The only reason is that we are choosing to believe something that is a lie, likely planted in our minds by the adversary, which leads us to act as if the heavens were against us and that we have to struggle for anything that we want to have in our life. Having had these experiences the past couple of weeks has reawakened me to this power we have within ourselves to receive every desire of our heart without effort, except for being aware when the opportunities present themselves and choosing to act on them (which is the work part). If you have a desire or a need, simply make that desire known, and from then on only have positive thoughts about it if it comes into your head. Know it can and will present itself if you don't create any kind of resistence to it. And watch the miracles happen. Life is full of miracles every single day, I am truly amazed.

Valentine's Day - My Favorite!

2009-02-19T21:26:00.000-08:00

I have to admit, Valentine's Day to me is by far the cutest holiday, and ever since I gave up making it "Singles Awareness Day" and something to have a pity party about, it has quickly grown into one of my favorite holidays. Maybe it's partly because I'm not left out of the gift-giving or receiving. My parents always surprise me with a cute Valentine's gift - a bouquet of flowers, a gift bag, a card, a thoughtful present... and it just lights up my day... actually the whole month. And in return I always have a couple of gifts and cards out on the dining table when they come out to eat that morning. Plus, my dad always has some sweet Valentine for my mom, which I love! Gift-giving is something I find so enjoyable (after the hard work of shopping for it is through). Maybe it's one of my love languages, who knows, but it is so fun for me. I also enjoy giving Valentines to any of my friends I get to have contact with that day. This year it was Heidi. Since neither of us have a significant male in our lives, I took the chance to spoil her with flowers and gifts, a night out at the movies, and take-out dinner from Kneaders. I have no desire to brag about my gift giving, I am instead celebrating that I had the chance to create a fun Valentines Day for myself and others close to me. The wonderful thing is that the flowers and gifts grace the house for the remainder of the month, and I feel warm inside every time I see them. I might possibly be a hopeless romantic from the sounds of it, but we won't know for sure until I find myself in a true romantic situation.

My New Blog

2009-02-16T10:30:00.000-08:00

I am creating this blog to give more space for my thoughts and experiences which I don't have room for on the family blog. This is also created so that I can share it with friends since the family blog is now private and available to family relatives only. I may eventually make this private as well, and then invite my friends to view it, we will see.